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From::Albuquerque, New Mexico, United States
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Phil's Advice: Got a problem? Let Phil help!
Wednesday, July 12, 2006Seriously I need one of these!!!!!
See If I had a trunk monkey, I think a lot of my problems would disappear... NO MORE SPEEDING TICKETS!!!! LOL... But I would have to expand to have it be a desk monkey at work too... For example when the buffalo came up to me at work today to preach to me about religion, I could have had my trunk monkey throw hooters wings at her fat ass until she left me alone!!! That would be awesome!!! And when diarrhea comes to dump her psychotic episodes on me, my desk monkey could make fart noises making fun of her while pointing and laughing until she went away, and if that doesn't work he could always throw staplers... LOL...
I really think having a desk/trunk monkey would do wonders... But I would probably get in trouble BC they would discriminate against monkeys or something... And knowing my luck I would get a dysfunctional monkey with a drug problem or something... I would have to give him like a pound of chronic just to get him to get the psychos off my back... And it would only get worse from there since weed is a gateway drug, he would then graduate to coke and later heroin.... Hell, I couldn't have a monkey dealing drugs out of my desk/trunk... Plus bananas could get expensive.... Hmmm maybe I should just get a dog....
P.S. Stew, thanks for saving me from the buffalo tonight, I owe you one!!!!