Monday, February 13, 2006

54 minutes with Michelle Kwan....


Michelle Kwan: you definitely haven't updated your blog in almost a week... that itself is very, very weak

Me: I updated 2 days ago

Michelle Kwan: that's almost a week to me hahaha

Me: thanks, that's an awesome complement... LOL

Michelle Kwan: of course it is lol when i don't wanna Ice skate or be an Olympian, i check myspace, facebook, your blog, and tuckermax lol so daily, i check probably between 5-10 times a day. so to a normal person, that'd be about a week's worth of online in one day lol so when a day goes by, i expect a new blog, cuz it's like a week to me lol

Me: why are you up so late? downloading porn?

Michelle Kwan: haha lol nah, just got home from some Olympic parties
Michelle Kwan: now what're yoooou doing up so late lol

Me: watching Olympics

Michelle Kwan: sounds like a better reason than mine haha

Me: so tell me your Olympic party story

Michelle Kwan: lol ummm i chugged a beer, went to Figure Skating at 10, came home, changed, went to some heaven and hell party where me and roommates were obviously too cool for because we didn't dress up lol took a whole bunch of jello shots, drank some more beer, talked with some crazy ass british guy...

Michelle Kwan: talked shit about all the stupid girls there (in particular one who i guess got pushed down the stairs by her ex lol), ummm danced, was violated by some fucking homosexual, danced some more, watched some gay dude practically have sex with some big black girl, danced some more, drank some more, came home

Me: that's kick ass, LOL I wish I was partying in Torino too...
Me: did you get some?

Michelle Kwan: besides being violated by the fag, nope lol
Michelle Kwan: what kinda stupid homo grabs two girls' crotches at once? lol

Me: maybe he wasn't gay

Michelle Kwan: oh, he was!! what kinda guy plucks his eyebrows, wears eyeliner, probably takes more time to get ready than i do, and dances up on other guys like he was humping them?

Me: LOL, holy shit, yeah he's gay!!!
Me: LMFAO, that's priceless

Michelle Kwan: shut your face lol

Me: did you do a keg stand?

Michelle Kwan: haha no lol especially not after reading some story by Tanya Harding, where she punched a girl in the vagina while she was doing a keg stand lol

Me: so did anyone yack?

Michelle Kwan: of course lol not me, but of course

Me: never you, bc you are the party queen

Michelle Kwan: haha oh god no, lol since 2006 started, i think i've drunken twice without puking lol lately i've just been so phlegming and yeah, i just haven't been able to handle it lol, but boy do i feel good after puking... and i generally wake up at like 5 or 6 am and puke... never like right after i drink or anything lol after i've passed out of course lol

Me: maybe your bulimic?

Michelle Kwan: if i were bulimic, i'm sure i would be puking at a higher rate than i am... probably more often than just when i drink lol

Me: yeah maybe you're right, it's good you're not

Michelle Kwan: lol and i'm sure if i were bulimic, i'd be skinny lol haha

Me: but you are skinny
Me: all Olympians think they're fat, when they're not

Michelle Kwan: haha we sit here and snack all day lol haha

Me: Really?

Michelle Kwan: lol we are definitely not the normal Olympic girls lol haha
Michelle Kwan: more girls ho themselves around and think they're hot shit and better than every other Olympic girl lol me and my roommates talk shit about them and know we're better than everyone else hahaha

Me: so you have a god complex?

Michelle Kwan: haha i'm just kidding lol we just know we're not morons like those stupid hos lol
Michelle Kwan: and if guys want us, it's obviously not cuz we're shoving our tits in their face or wearing skirts that cover the top of my ass crack

Me: Do you streak for action?

Michelle Kwan: lol i won't lie, that'd be a no

Me: I bet you Olympic Skater girls get hit on all the time though

Michelle Kwan: i'm gonna say it's either cuz i have big tits, i'm asian, or a combination of the two lol

Me: do guys ever say hey nice tits?

Michelle Kwan: lol actually one time, i went into a kitchen to grab some beer and some guy talking to people and as i walked by, he was like, nice tits lol, it makes me laugh lol i guess most girls would get offended, but i think it's funny lol

Me: that's bc you're an Olympic skater pimp

Michelle Kwan: lol and it's funny when guys just stare haha like tonight, this british kid was talking to us, and he just stared, even as he talked lol

Me: did you touch them or cover them as he stared?

Michelle Kwan: haha i just laughed and ignored him lol

Me:are you pissed about not competing?

Michelle Kwan: Nah I have tons of metals lol

Me: how's the groin?

Michelle Kwan: It will be fine after Pedro my massage therapist has a go at it lol

Michelle Kwan: but i think imma pass out now lol I have an early flight back to the states, so you have a good night there lol

Me: you too

Cheers,
Craig
Posted by CT :: 10:43 PM :: 2 comments|

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