Friday, July 28, 2006

Tribute

Hello Blog People. You all know me as rlg. I'm the saucy commenter that simply doesn't know when to shut up. I'm guest blogging as a favor to CT and until 12 hours ago this was going to be a totally different guest spot. Aaahh, but how quickly my mind can be changed....

I've decided to tell you a story---a story of mediocre sex and much melodrama. Any characterizations that point you straight to a real person, well, that's just a silly misunderstanding. I swear! I swear on ten Holy Bibles!!

There once was a lusty and chauvinistic man named Lothario who decided to woo and win the sexual favors of a seemingly normal girl. Nelly fell for Lothario's smooth words and in short order they found themselves in a full blown spring fling. Unfortunately the sex was awful, they had nothing in common, and the fling soon fizzled. Things may have died off right there except that Lothario told a tiny naughty detail of the fling to a friend and when Nelly found out she lost her temper and publicly denounced and berated the whole affair. So Lothario responded in kind and a long and deeply evil blog war ensued. Eventually a bloody but brilliant truce was called. Lothario's reputations was in tatters and Nelly was on the edge of a psychotic breakdown but it was agreed that the whole nasty mess would never be dredged up again and they would live on opposite sides of the world...and certainly not ever have contact again....

There came a day, however, when Nelly thought, "You know that whole spring fling wasn't half bad. We could work on the sex and I can woo and win Lothario and live happily ever after!" Lothario, on the other hand, had moved on and was wooing and having fabulous sexual congress with a nice lady named Eve. Eve was much taken with Lothario and not about to let Nelly have a chance at him again. Nelly tried to IM and text message Lothario. Lothario ignored her. Then she tried voice messages and email. Lothario ignored her. Nelly's pleas for forgiveness and pledges of love and friendship turned to rages and violent verbal assaults. Lothario ignored her. Nelly sent presents and tokens of love. Lothario ignored her. He ignored Nelly not out of spite and hate but because he was, mmmmmm, well, firmly buried in his relations with Eve.

One day Eve said to Lothario, "Let's runaway to Borneo and raise trunk monkeys and leave Nelly's nasty hounding behind." And so they did and lived happily ever after.

The end

Epilogue: In a strange and certainly unrelated event, Nelly was killed shortly there after by a rouge trunk monkey attack when she tried to debark from a plane in Borneo. Stalker laws there are very strict....LOL....LMAO....


I hope this story clarifies things for all of CT's blog readers.

And when we next hear reports of CT in bed and screaming....I really doubt that he'll be blaming it on bad dreams....

LOL, Rach
Posted by CT :: 1:15 AM :: 11 comments|

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